BL Sports: Baseball Opening Day

A Post By: Michael Gallo

Opening day. The first day of spring. An excuse to skip school, work, a child’s birth, legal obligations, court appearances, and parental duties. An opportunity to dust off the baseball mitt, and harvest that crop of peanuts you’ve been growing since last fall (they’re too expensive at the park, we know).

Opening day is the symbolic return of so many things, the most important being a sport that actually matters. For months now I have endured boring NFL games, an onslaught of college basketball games, NBA games with predictable storylines and outcomes, and even a few NCAA gymnastics meets that I had some money on.

You constantly listen to people complain about how boring baseball is, how slow it moves, how it isn’t exciting, but you know. You appreciate baseball for what it really is: A sport that intelligent people appreciate. You’re not looking for a bunch of overpaid roided-out maniacs to hit each other. You’re looking for a bunch of overpaid roided-out maniacs to hit home runs.

Baseball is unique, just like you.

Opening day is another opportunity to let out your fanaticism. Another opportunity to get “asked” to leave bars because you’re scaring the regulars, and not using “family friendly language”. This, you cannot deny, is directly related to the last couple of court appearances you have made. If telling a bouncer to “shove it up your ass” is a crime, then I don’t want to be innocent.

Judge using his gavel

Opening day is an opportunity to relax. It’s an opportunity to let go of the stress of the world, to forget about the depression and gloom of winter, and to welcome in the warmth and promise of spring. Opening day is the world renewed.

Opening day is an opportunity to see how several story lines play out:

Story line one: How will the plethora of injuries affect the Yankees? The New York Yankees have more injured people than a nursing home that uses firefighter poles instead of stairs.

Story line Two: Will Joba Chamberlain’s mustache be a factor? Is he playing an Italian Immigrant in a local opera? Is he a butcher?


Story line Three: Will all of our players begin receiving AARP benefits?

In a way, that’s the beauty of opening day. So many questions, so few answers. You just have to have a little patience and wait to see how it all plays out. Just like life. Or a pet raccoon pregnancy.

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